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21 April 2007

3:14 PM

difference.

9 weeks was bliss i tell you. and now, school seems rarely unfamilliar.

for some reason, i find inconsistency in almost everything nowadays. this does not mean this constant transformation was all negative or all positive as well.

transformation, or in other words, development, is beneficial and not many can see that. i have come to a point where i found myself but i still am unable to say with confidence that i have found myself completely. i bet everyone is still searching, searching for a way out or in. this journey, is one heck of a mess. a long and winding road and funny how no soul can get out of this mess.

well, transformation can mean change as well. and change is another aspect of difference.
what a difference a day made. and to be honest, i seriously agree with jamie cullum. observation and experiences allowed that to happen. and i guess, it's rather shocking in many ways if you get what i mean. changes can be ridiculous.

conversion. that's another form of difference, transformation, change, development. conversions are alterations in life which cannot be evaded. whether or not there is a resolution to that, sometimes, leaving it be is the best of ways to normalise the situation. alterations might not be permanent. hence, such might just be unecessary and leaving it be would generally seem like smartest but not easiest solution.

what i am trying to drill here is that difference is something in life which comes more often than not and i suppose, in every way possible, we try to deal with it. i know i am one who would make a point known if i strongly feel for it. antagonise. and that's how i deal with difference. but yet, difference can be unecessary or necessary but either ways, sometimes, it is true that leaving it be works best for me as well. letting life work its way out on its own with the man up there guiding the whole process works for me.

some might insult me for the fact that i can be skeptical, for the fact that i am so paranoid that i just want to find a way out in dealing with difference so i just leave it be. i am not saying that i do not speak up, i love to. i still do and when i've tried so hard, and so much, i would come to a stage where i think i have done enough to deal with the difference and leave it be.

so.

you tell me how.

when confrontation seems cliche.

stuck with difference.